Saturday, August 30, 2003

I'm off to Thorpe Park. I'll try not to break anything or throw up. More when I get back.

Thorpe Park

I'm back again. What a laugh that was. Left the flat WAY too early for Sunday and made my way to Southampton to meet up with the guys I'm going with.

Once we get there, the first ride we go on is the Colossus. It has the world record for the most inversions on a roller coaster. As well as height restrictions, you can't go on it if you have enormous boobies so be warned! FUN! It's the best roller coaster I've been on in a while. The upside downy stuff is a hoot!

Next I went on No Way Out. It's a roller coaster completely enclosed in a big pyramid. I got into the front car and it only went bloody backwards! It's pitch black with the occasional strobe for atmosphere. Very cool! You have no idea where it's going to go next.

Then we went on the Detonator. It's really simple. Basically, it winches you about 40 metres up and lets you drop! I thought I would try and fight my instinct to hold on to something and succeeded! It's bloody MENTAL! It gave me and my friends the biggest buzz of the day by a long way! I was shaking when I got off it.

Next was Nemesis Inferno. Dangly leg action and twirly stuff. Nice touch when you go through a "volanic" cave in the dark with glowy red stuff.

Went on the Rhumba Rapids. Sounded more exciting when it used to be Thunder River and it wasn't sponsored by Ribena. Twirly floaty moist fun. Spinny tea cups next. Can't go to Thorpe Park without going on the Spinny tea cups.

Next was the Tidal Wave. This one is bloody high! It's about 30 metres up and it throws you into the water and creates a massive wave. When you first hit, you instantly think "that wasn't to bad". The the water comes down, and keeps coming, and keeps coming! I got absolutely drenched. Emma had excellent drowned-rat-comedy-hair-with-a-parting-in-the-back.

Then we went to Pirates 4-D. Vibraty chair, blowy, squirty 3-D cinema action with Leslie Nielsen and Eric Idle. The 3-D spider made me cack myself!

Last ride we went on was Quantum. It's like a platform that is lifted into the air on spinny stuff. Pretty cool. Tame enough to goof around on. I was sat opposite my sister. She screamed lots.

And that was it. What a laugh. Thoroughly enjoyed it and successfully regressed to my childhood (although that not too difficult for me... hehe.)

Tegenaria Domestica

This is one of the spiders that come running across the living-room floor when you are watching Star Trek...and suddenly everybody is standing on a chair...boy can they be big...at least for the UK.

The female of the above can reach a size of 18 mm, with the male being about 4 mm smaller. It is mainly found in houses and gardens but also under logs and holes in banks especially in southern England.

Males and females live together for some weeks after mating until the male dies, when his remains will be eaten by the female. The egg sac is spherical and covered with a thin layer of soil or wood-chips (depends on habitat) or, if these materials are not available, then with remains of prey etc. This layer is often covered with another layer of silk, and the whole is placed within the web structure.

AND THERE'S TWO OF THE FUCKERS STALKING ME, RIGHT NOW!!!!

Friday, August 29, 2003

Ninja!

Ever wanted to know how to be a Ninja? Clicky linky and all will be revealed!
MAFFY CANNOT BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INJURIES RESULTING FROM THIS POST. USE AT YOUR OWN RISK

Lurgee Alert!

Okay, it's official, I have a cold! I also have an stupid cough too. Not irritating, not chesty, not even tickly... it's STUPID. It makes me sound like a badger being strangled and I don't even know what noise badgers make! I fully blame everyone at the Reading Festival for this turn of events. I hope you're pleased with yourselves! I'm off to bed. Feel free to add messages of sympathy to the comments on this post to help me get better quicker.

Thursday, August 28, 2003

Listen Play Read

Added a little something to the sidebar today just to let you all know what I like to listen to, read and play. I will update it from time to time.

Wednesday, August 27, 2003

The Mars Opposition

MarsToday, at 9.51 GMT, Mars was closer to Earth than at any time since 57,617 BC – 59,619 years ago. The Red Planet approached to within 34,646,418 miles (55,758,006 km) of Earth – only 145 times the distance of the Moon. It won't be as near again until 2287 August 28.

Mars is in the constellation Aquarius right now, and easily identified as the brightest object in the night sky (apart from the Moon) as well as by its orange-red colour. It will remain easy to spot for several months, low in the sky for UK observers and others in mid-Northern latitudes, somewhere between the southeast and the southwest (depending on the date and time.)

At its peak brightness, Mars will reach magnitude -2.9, far outshining the brightest star, Sirius (magnitude -1.5). It will remain brighter than Sirius until mid-October. Venus is the only planet that can appear brighter, but Venus will not be easily visible again until December 2003.

In Assyria, Mars was known as the "Shedder of Blood". The Red Planet also represented the god of war for the Vikings, the Greeks and the Romans. The red colouration of Mars is due to oxidised iron minerals in the surface rocks – rust.

Info and Images found on Royal Astronomical Society and National Astronomy Week 2003 websites.

If you live the right way, this world rocks

Go here... It's my mate Jay's new blog. Run in fear as he climbs many interesting trees.

Naturally, he was inspired by me!

Subliminal Messages

Click This. It's very "informative"...

Metallica Review v2.0

Yesterday, I found this review of St Anger on the Metallica Message Board. The biggest Metallica fan I know got a mini ooberlooba on so I'll post this flyer I found instead.

franteek

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

Holy Shit!

Uneditted footage from Apollo 11

BlogSpeak

Installed a comments system from BlogSpeak. I was using enetation but it's well clunky. Leave me a comment now that it seems to be working okay.

Post Reading Blues

I missed my duvet. Slept like a log last night. So good to sleep in my own bed. Still don't feel like I've returned to real life yet. Still, I go back to work tomorrow. That'll bring me back to Earth.

Went into Bournemouth today and got tickets for The Darkness at the BIC in December. Tried to get tickets for Muse but they were all gone. I will have to try alternative means.

Got System of a Down - Toxicity, Metallica - St Anger (I can delete it from my hard drive now...), and Iron Maiden - Edward the Great. Will be getting The Datsuns - The Datsuns and Metallica - Ride the Lightning.

Monday, August 25, 2003

I'm Baaack! - The Reading Festival 2003

And clean. You don't want to know the colour of my bath water. I had to wash my hair three times to get all the shit out! This is what happenned

**Thursday**

Arrived at the site and there is a big queue. We're all on the way to being pissed before we park. Pitch the tents. Sit and drink more. Go and meet random people. Eventually hook up with a bunch of nice semi-sane people (not that I'm against insanity, it's more exciting), hang out and get wrecked. Jay's nickname is "Bob". Andy's nickname is "Kate". My nickname is "Mysterious Matt in Black"

**Friday**

Jay pukes his ring for most of the day. Andy has a minging hangover and I am only slightly better off than Andy. Andy and Jay both have drinks that they call their "Festival Mix". Andy's is usually Southern Comfort and lemonade HEAVY on the Southern Comfort but this year he decides to replace it with a cheaper version, probably with quantity and not quality in mind. The result is a mix that doubles as paint stripper and is easily mistaken for piss. Jay's is 50% Traditional lemonade, you know, the one with all the bits in it, and 100% Vodka. This one is luminous green and tastes decent but has the side effect of making you puke until the following afternoon. Mine is large amounts of Lager mixed with large amounts of Lager :)

We drag ourselves to the arena and head to the Radio One stage. I'm going there to see bands that I would not normally pay to see.

First up is Violent Delight. They call themselves a Pu-Metal band because, and I quote "it's a mix of punk and metal that both punk and metal fans won't actually like." Lucky we only saw the last few tunes... Next up is Young Heart Attack. They sucked. Then we saw Saves The Day. Samey Country Rock. Shite. Next is OKGO. They are best of this lot. Simple Guitar Rock. Nishe.

On to the Main Stage to watch The Datsuns. Never took much notice of them before now but they were really good. One of the best bands at the festival.

Back to tent for beer top up. Do unexpected comedy slide in puke. Didn't go over.

Next is The Darkness. MMMMETAAAAAAAAAL!!! Frontman Justin appears on stage after the rest of the band and shouts "Coooo-ey!" Class. They are all straight out of the 80s Stadium Rock scene and are single handedly trying resurrect it with full on spandex style. (Black and white stripes, VERY skin tight, mmmmmm, niiiiice.) They had the entire crowd sing in falsetto "Get your hands off my wooo-man, mother fu-ckeeeeeer" and had us giving the "Thumbs Up." The crowd was WELL into it. Hair-shaking thumbs-up metal. I really hope they are more than a flash-in-the-pan...

Next is Placebo. Good enough but dull. Not really appropriate for the crowd but battled on.

Then came Blink 182. Mad as fuck. Played up to the crowd and took the piss. A lot of fun.

Finally I went to the Radio One stage to watch The Polyphonic Spree. I'm sure I could like them and they are talented but I wasn't in the mood so I went back to the tent.

Early night for all of us after last night’s shenanigans.

**Saturday**

Wake up. Pringles, Chewy Bars and Beer. I'm officially crusty by this time. Mong in front of the Half Pipe which miraculously appeared overnight. Top action. Many painful wipeouts and impressive as fuck.

Saw some of My Morning Jacket and Jet in the Radio One tent. I appreciated the shade more than the bands.

Watched The Streets on the Main Stage. Sound was shit. They were okay-ish.

Tent. Beer. Limbo. Random People.

Beck next. This guy is a loon. Very good.

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club up next. They replaced The White Stripes and did a really good job. The crowd was into them. They did a cover of the Stripes tune "The Hardest Button to Button". Classy. I will be checking them out.

Blur. Rumours abound that Graham will be back. They've still got it. Played one of my favourite tunes "This Is A Low". Didn't play one of my favourite tunes "There's No Other Way". Damon fell off the stage but I missed it (Beer). If I had seen it, I'd have been rolling around. Damon gets all emotional and sloppy about the fans and about Graham leaving the band. Phil Daniels appears for Parklife. Top! No Graham (boo to dodgy rumours)

Random People. Tent. Beer. High Fived Jesus.

Girlies that we met on Thursday appear. They are a good laugh and Jay gets cosy with one of them and climbs trees.

4am. Sleep/Pass out

**Sunday**

Wake up. Raise eyebrows. Random female in tent with us... Jay's been busy...

Andy's birthday. He's as old as me now! Happy Birthday. He gets to watch his all time favourite band on his 30th. Lucky lucky bastard! Camp Brown 6 sing happy birthday. Kewl!

Pringles. Chewy Bars. Fruit. No Beer. Started reading 'The Bridge' by Iain Banks. It's mental! Will let you know when I finish it.

Wander to Radio One Stage with the girls and random bloke. Camp Brown 2 sing happy birthday to Andy.

Saw The Applicators. Chicks rocking out... top fun in my book. (music is forgettable...) Kinesis on next. Best I saw in the Radio One Stage. Good solid rocking action. Will sample their wares, methinks. Serifn. Pretty boring but okay. Must do better... The Ravonettes. Eh?

Random People. Tent. Beer. 118 can fuck RIGHT off. I'm sick of it by now. OLD SKOOL 192!!!!! Free hugs appear for the first time.

Primal Scream. Okay apart from Artiste Hissy Fit. "You're all slaves. Your here to watch Metallica and other shite bands." Please fuck right off.... and he did. Very disappointing because I like their music.

Sum 41 up on stage. Heard rumours that Sum 41 were all over the place at Leeds. Didn't share it with the guys because I want to see them at least once so I can tell my little sis about them. Rumours suck. Sum 41 didn't. They gave it as full on metal as they could. Played Anna Nicole Smith is a Fucking Cunt. Awesome.

System of a Down. Mad as badgers! Sure they're all political and convey messages they consider important and relevant but they have such a flair for the dramatic that I couldn't stop laughing. Excellent music for moshing to... if you know when the fast bits in the song are. I was impressed and I'm going to give their album a try.

Metallica are up next. As the SOAD crowd lead, an opening presents itself and we end up about 5 metres from the front. The crowd sings to Run To The Hills by Iron Maiden. You get the drift. Metallica appears! Fuck!!! The crowd surges and move left and right in a mental crush. Jay and Andy evaporate. Missed the first two songs because I'm trying not to go under thousands of steel toe-capped DMs. The guy next to me goes over and I'm standing on him. I pull him up and he says "Fuck This! I'm getting out of here!" I agree. So I try to go over to surf the crowd. No joy. They're all to busy holding themselves up. Spend the next song literally fighting my way through the crush and get to the back. Scary. Eventually end up at the back of the main mosh pit. Metallica are the gods of metal and live up to it. They play lots of their old stuff which is fucking great. I'm going to have to buy the entire back catalogue now... Pyro... Metal... Moshing... Headbanging... Pogoing... I went mental. Nuff said. Jay lasted a while longer than me. Andy is up front the entire time. Respect is due! What a birthday! Lars announces a gig at Earl's Court in December. Will try to get tickets for that!

It's all over! It went so quickly. I stagger around the arena for half an hour. Search for plectrums in front of the stage. No joy unsurprisingly. Made my way back via the girlies. The Reading Rip Up starts. "Tear the place up, pass it on!"

Our camp is relatively docile (phew!) and Andy gets all emotional. Group hugs etc. End up in Brown 2 with girlies and their mates. We all get on really well and they must be nearly half our age! The Reading Rip Up sings happy birthday to Andy. Brown 2 is Mental!!! Tents Exploding. Fireworks. Boobies. Puke. Shit. Pyramids. Naked Men. Boobies. Speed Darkcore. Heavy Metal. Busted. 118. Free Hugs. Boobies. Beer. Fascist Glaswegian Security Cunts. Fire Marshals. Tent Diving. Poo Limbo. You get the idea. Jay and a girlie go off to climb a tree...

4am. I head back. Jay is getting comfortable with this girlie. From the tent I hear him say to me "Fuck off, I'm busy!" INSTANT ooberlooba! It turns out that it was just a furtive "Erm... Busy." I'm pissed and emotional. I'm allowed.

**Monday**

(No sleep)

Mega random wander. Play starfish! One of the girlies told me about this from Reading 2002. Spend an hour drinking other people’s beer and dancing to 80s metal. Starfish involves a group moving/dancing/staggering through the site and at any moment the leader shouts STARFISH and everyone has to drop to the floor on their backs in a starfish. Childish.... yep. Fun.... totally! Sit at fires. People from all over. The Rip Up continues mainly in Brown 2 and the neighbouring sites. It's 6am and the "background" noise sounds something like "AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Pass out/Sleep outside at our tents for an hour. Wander. Free Hugs and 118 all over the place. Chill with the Bumpkin Crew. Guess where they are from...

Back to tent. Jay goes on major guilt trip (hehe). I milk it a little bit. But if you got trees to climb, I'd do the same...

Pack up and leave. Go to Little Chef. Use REAL toilets. Wash hands! I sit down in a real chair for the first time since Thursday morning. Olympic Breakfast. Tea. Yay!

That was the one hundred hour bender that was the Reading Festival 2003. Best festival I've done yet. Andy agreed and I think Jay really enjoyed himself :)

Right. I've been awake for 40 hours and I'm knackered. Beeeeeeeeed!

Thursday, August 21, 2003

Japanese mentalness

This will make your ears and eyes bleed....

Monday, August 18, 2003

I'm going to the Reading Festival and the Dons won

Feltham 0-2 AFC Wimbledon. And Withdean lost! Top start to our promotion season! Woo!

Yay! I'm going to sit in a field getting wasted and listening to live music for three days! I haven't been to a festival since Glastonbury 2000 but I still consider myself a festival crusty. Or I will do after two days of dirt and vodka. It's really strange because I'm a total lightweight when it comes to drink and debauchery but stick me in a field with a live band and booze and I'd drink anyone under the table.

I'm going with Andy (true rocker) and Jay (music snob), like me, veterans of several festivals. I'm not sure who I'm going to see and I'm not really planning anything. The official site is here. On the Main Stage, I want to see Blink 182, Placebo, The Darkness, Blur, Beck, Doves, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, Primal Scream, System of a Down and Metallica. I don't really know many of the bands on the other stages but hopefully it will expand my horizons again. As always at festivals, there are some NIGHTMARE clashes, like Metallica and The Music.

I'm currently listening to Permission to Land by The Darkness and St Anger by Metallica.

Thursday, August 14, 2003

More messing around

I'm going to see if I can display an image (that was photoshopped by my own fair hand) from my website...

edit: Yay! It worked! There's no going back now...

This is a recording

Just trying out stuff. Please, nothing to see in this post. You can go about your business. Move along.

Life, the Universe and Wagon Wheels

This freaked me out when I thought about it too much… As we understand the universe, it all started with the Big Bang and the universe has been expanding ever since. Distant galaxies are moving away from us uniformly in ALL directions. This means we are at the centre of the universe… right?

Wrong… When the Big Bang occurred, it happened at EVERY point in the universe, which means that EVERY point in the universe is expanding including every atom in our bodies.

While you have been reading this, YOU have expanded.

(Wagon Wheels, however, are not subject to this expansion which explains why they were so much bigger when I was a nipper.)

That's enough of Hubble's Law for now, I'm off down the pub.

</geek>

L337 5pe4k m4K3$ j00 LOO|< R3t4R|)3|)

This will make you look like a L337 h4x0r when you're in AOL chat rooms. 1 50 0wnz0R yoU, NOO8

Wednesday, August 13, 2003

And so it begins...

Well, I've got a Blog.... You will see here just random anything. I might find a groovy website or want to get something off my chest. To be quite honest, I have no idea where this will go. I expect it will be very organic and take on a life of it's own. I could tell you about myself and what I do and what I like but my intention is that, as this develops, my character and personality will manifest itself. (and I just hope I don't bore the shit out of you all doing it....)