A Wedding, A Pub Crawl and A Marathon of Sport

So, I went to Neil and Karen's wedding on Friday. It was all good I suppose.... you know... how weddings should be. But I thought that Neil was going to cry while he was saying his vows and not Karen. Why was this? Was it pure joy and happiness or the shotgun? (I'm going STRAIGHT to hell for that... and I may delete if I lose my bottle.)

The reception was okay and there was plenty of free food and booze but I couldn't drink because of these industrial strength anti-boitics I'm on. BOO! I have a tendency to get completely lashed when in two certain situations, either if I'm having a really good time or if I'm bored out of my head and I definitely had an urge to get completely wasted! (I'll let you figure out which reason I was going for.) Pete was providing decent entertainment and was making eyes at this really pretty girl with legs that went on for ages! It turns out that it was Karen's baby sister who is only 15. We did not let him forget it all evening. I also found out that he is mates with the bloke who runs the UK Metallica Fan Club. (Logged for future reference)

Kev was being his usual self and being too loud and making some totally inappropriate comments. Nice one Kev! The speeches were okay. In Rory's speech (he was the best man) he explained the meanings of the happy couple's names. It turns out the Neil means "little champion." Years of mocking to come there... hehe. Oh, and one other thing... WHERE WAS THE FRICKEN MUSIC??? I didn't hear so much as a squeak from a stereo or ANYTHING! Major downer!

One really funny moment to note however. The conversation had got really base towards the end of the evening. Pretty much par for the course. We were talking about bumgay stuff... y'know... K-Y, chafing, that sort of thing. At a lull in the conversation, Lindsey, Rory's girlfriend, attempted to change the subject onto something a little more savoury. She said with a completely straight face and totally innocently "Neil. Can I see your ring?"

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Saturday, woke up really late and watched Soccer AM. Top show! Went to see Mum and lent her some money and I feel really good for doing this. Well, she's got me out of a few sticky situations with money before so it's only fair.

Watched the qualifying for the Italian GP at Monza. It was pretty good and I found myself shouting at the TV when Montoya was on his lap. He didn't quite get pole but is on the front row with Schumacher and Raikonnen is right behind them. This should make for a good start to the race. Went shopping. Went home. Played Deus Ex for a bit, read a couple of chapters of The Bridge (this book is totally mental!), watched some footy. Went out to Bournemouth.

Met up with James, Kate, Beth, Catherine and Tory at the Lighthouse (or So Bar as it's now called...) Of course, I'm not able to drink through fear of spazzing my drugs and I have the urge to get TOTALLY lashed. James is an absolute monster when it comes to drinking and can drink so much that if I tried to keep up, I would be sleeping off a stomach pump right now. The man is a animal. Go onto Bar Med and meet up with Kate's bit of stuff called Kickable and his really weird and irritating mate. Why he's called Kickable I have NO idea and didn't think to ask.

Onto Walkabout and then Yates' and everyone else is getting wasted. I'm really jealous... Kate starts grinding me at regular intervals which is nice to start with but gets a bit much after a while. She is a lovely girl but I don't fancy her at all I'm afraid. But she knows this and we are just have a laugh. Catherine makes a plea for help to keep the mate of Kickable away from her because he is freaking her out. Mate of Kickable is a complete twunt and we start making plans to ditch him. James keeps buying these weird and wacky shorts and is handing them round to everyone. Blue ones, green ones, clear ones. All very interesting viewing. Beth is well on her way. She is definitely one of the coolest people on the planet. She like the same kind of music as me, her boyfriend owns a Carmen Ghia and is in a band and makes money off this, she has a calming influence on me at work when I get stressed out and she owns a restored black 1958 VW Beetle.

Onto Brazil's. A dodgy little club with very strange people in there. I am being sociable and get talking to Catherine for a while. She is into Sci-Fi like me and it turns out that her favourite film is Blade Runner. Same as me! We continue talking random stuff for a while. Beth seems to think that we should get it on. I was only being friendly! She doesn't know any of us apart from Tory so was probably felt a little awkward. Anyway, logged for future reference :) Everyone is steaming by now and we are busting some wicked moves and cutting some serious shapes on the dance floor. Kate grinds a bit more.

I get all emotional with Tory because we haven't seen each other since she quit the company I work at. We are really good mates and it hasn't been the same since she went. For those who don't know Tory, she is one of those stunningly beautiful people blessed with an awesome personality and gets on with everyone. Fan-TAS-tic boobies too! Also, she's married of course and her husband, Paul, is really cool and we get on great. I hadn't seen him for something like three years and I went round to their house and we picked up right where we left off when I used to work with him at the last company I was at.

We stagger on to Toko and James is getting a bit punchy now and we have to watch him. He stares out a minibus on the way over. Bless. Booze for everyone else (sob) and onto the dance floor. They play some really weird stuff in there as well as normal stuff. One combination is 'I Think We're Alone Now' by Tiffany into 'I Believe In A Thing Called Love' by The Darkness into 'Club Tropicana' by Wham. No one in there gets The Darkness apart from us. The dance floor is static! Bunch of Philistines!

I take Beth home and she hasn't been in the MR2 before. It's nice and dry so I give it hoon around a roundabout. In at 30mph round to the last exit, out at 45mph, blast off, Niiiice. She is quite drunk so I don't do it again...

Go home. Blog.

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Tomorrow, I'm going to be really lazy and watch copious amounts of sport. The Italian GP is on. Go Montoya! He SO has to win! Then I think I'll catch a bit of Football. Finally a six hour NFL marathon with Andy.

That is all.