YAARRRR!

Pirates of the Caribbean!

What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

I found this at Bilge Flaps and I liked my result so I had to post it. Which reminds me, not long until September 19th... International Talk Like A Pirate Day.

Half Inch

Blimey! Someone's nicked The Scream! You'd have thought that it was under maxi mental psycho security but it appears that they just nicked it in broad daylight in front of a load of visitors. Bloody Norwegians.

I didn't think it was that good anyway...

</philistine>

Sniping and Kittens (again...) and Definitive Stairway

So, I was in a fecking FOUL mood this morning for various reasons. One factor was being awake before midday. The other was that I had a major panic about the Reading Festival but that sorted itself out and I'm now 99% going due to some top evil sniping on Ebay by my mum. (Ebay guru but an IT luddite... work that one out...) That cheered me up.

I also had a full on fluff overload. I stumbled across a news site today during my lunch break and it had a picture on it that put a lump in my throat faster than you can say "ah bless!" This has to be the cutest kitten on the entire planet... ever! And before you end up a bawling wreck, read the caption...

I also remembered that I own the definitive version of "Stairway to Heaven". You know, the one by Rolf Harris. "There's a lady who's sure all that glitters is gold and she's buying a stairway to heaven... ALTOGETHER now!" Pure Genius. Now all I have to figure out is what was I on that day...

Kung Fu Madness

This Rocks!

CALM DOWN, dear...
It's
just
a
com-MER-cial !!!

Business as usual for the SuperDons

They're in a new league but it's business as usual for AFC Wimbledon. They came back from 0-1 down to win 5-1 in a masterful display. That's 64 league wins in a row now. Man of the match Jamie Taylor bagged 2 as did Richard Butler and Steve Butler scored one. Ursell and his golden boots (seriously...) were masterful in the middle.

Bit of a relief but I don't think we can get complacent. There are definitely teams in the Ryman League Division One to challenge us.

And so it continues...

Planet: Maffydoo is one year old today! Yay!

And I still have no idea what I'm doing. It was once organic and it did take on a life of it's own. Then it died. Now this is my undead blog, stalking the night and looking for spicy brains to feed on. It's strange... I feel like I've been blogging since forever but it's only a year. Does that mean I've been having fun doing it? Who knows, but I've learned not to blog for the sake of it and to mostly ignore my traffic counter so I think I'm a content blogger.

Well, here's to another year and another couple of hundred posts.

Neo-Dons and MK Dongs

The new season starts for AFC Wimbledon on Saturday against Ashford Town in the Ryman League Division One.

It's been a bit of a bumpy ride. Iconic manager Terry Eames was sacked for being a gobby twat and basically sticking his foot RIGHT in it and Nicky English, the youth coach, was called to stand in. He managed to get us to the end of the season with no alarms and no surprises and his passion in the dugout impressed many fans who called for him to be made the first team manager.

Nicky English wasn't to be the boss. Dave Anderson was appointed. He came from Hendon FC where he took them to eighth, second and then fourth last year in the Ryman Premier League and they won the Middlesex Cup three years in a row with virtually zero cash and resources. This was an 'interesting' appointment and left me and a lot of fans with serious reservations about his capabilities to run a club with the prestige (relatively speaking...) of Wimbledon. Within a few weeks, half of the team that won the double last year had gone and a new breed of Neo-Dons had taken their place. I must admit I raised my eyebrows more than once as I read the latest developments.

The pre-season has reassured me a bit as we managed to beat Conference side Barnet and drew against Conference side Gravesend and Northfleet (should have won...) We haven't lost in six games and the Neo-Dons are gelling with the remnants of last years team. It looks like DA knows what he's doing and appears to have the ability to lead us up the non-league pyramid over the next few years. It's still early days and time will tell but it all looks very positive right now.

Wimbledon will be the third club in recent times to rise from the ashes after Newport County and Aldershot Town. It just goes to prove that whatever franchisers and crap directors do, a football club can never be killed off forever if the fans stick together.

Which brings me on to the team that now resides in Wimbledon's league position, the Milton Keynes Dons. I am quite astonished at the level of hatred towards this team. They have managed to make themselves more hated than Manchester United which is an achievement in itself. Every single team in League 1/ Division 2/ Third Division see them as a must win and many of the away fans are boycotting the games in favour of Wimbledon's games. I fail to see how they can survive in their current situation. The predicted "frenzy of football" has failed to materialise as they struggle to get a thousand home fans through the turnstiles at Winky's Wibbly Whacky Family World at the National Hockey Stadium. And I don't believe the attendances Winky is declaring for even a nano-second...

Many people say that I should forget about the franchise and concentrate on the real Wimbledon. It's obvious who is going to be higher in the leagues in 10 years. But forgetting it means that they win. This cannot happen again. We cannot let this become history. What if it happens to your club...

Boom

Nuclear bombs are bad, kids. Don't mess! Seriously!

We are a long way from the Cold War and the constant threat of a geriatric American and an even more geriatric Russian with big shiny red buttons that say "BOOM!" ready to nuke the crap out of each other. No, now we are just waiting for some brainwashed nutter terrorist to get a black market nuke from Uzbekistan or Ukraine and melt a few thousand people in the name of some crusty misunderstood god, and then get the crap nuked out of them by a geriatric American with a big shiny red button the says "BOOM!". Of course, we are now that much safer with the HM Department of Vague Paranoia's Preparing for Emergencies website... but I digress.

Nuclear explosions are really quite pretty if you can see past the fact that they are the most horrifying thing... ever... period, and I found some wallpapers which make for some wonderfully macabre desktops. I am freaking out my cow orkers with the Castle Bravo test explosion at the moment...

>>> LINKY <<<

So, who in the wide world of sports is clicking those links in the spam mails? What sort of fucking retards are making spam profitable? No... You don't want prescription medication. You don't want to get a loan off a shark. You definitely don't want to add three inches. You want to GROW A FUCKING BRAIN! Delete it for fuck's sake!

It's all a bloody conspiracy anyway. Hackers, crackers and spammers are employed by the big AV firms and MS. How the fuck do you think they would make their money? Bastards! All of them!

</rant>

While I'm on the subject of viruses, I'm feeling a lot better after the DDOS attack against my tonsils.

Kitten Delirium

I have the bloody bastard bloody lurgee of bloody doom and I'm taking medicine that will make my wee smell funny because of it.

I find kittens therapeutic so here's one. I find photoshopping kittens therapeutic so I may have to add a hat or a moustache or something at a later date.

Look... I'm delirious... OKAY! I demand sympathy!

Nutter!

This is REALLY odd....

Right... There's this old Somalian fella, his name's Ahmed. You might have heard of him. He recently lost in some obscure game show that I know a few of you are watching. I believe it's called Big Brother. Anyhow, this year the focus was on the fact that this particular edition of the game show was going to "evil". So, they didn't pick the usual normal, "mentally sturdy" (for want of a better word) types. They picked a few total loons and chief among them was that chap I mentioned up there... Ahmed. His sole purpose upon entering the game show was to go mental and wind the others up. Well, he went mental and the others got wound up. He tried a military coup for fuck's sake! Cuckoo!

You don't believe me? Okay, cop a listen of this! I reckon he's lost it... Fame WILL destroy this man. Ciao!

Ten Random MP3s

Found this at Dearie Me and decided to give it a whirl. Instructions are as follows...
 
Step 1: Open your mp3 player/music application.
Step 2: Put all of your music on random.
Step 3: List the first ten songs it plays, no matter how embarrassing.
 
I only have 231 tracks to play with. These are tunes that I acquired on an impulse or was sent. I haven't got around to converting my CD collection so I should get some weird and interesting results.
 
McLusky - Lightsaber Cocksucking Blues
Nothing deep and meaningful here. Had to get this tune after seeing this... it still makes me laugh.
 
Armand Van Helden - You Don't Even Know Me
A decent dance tune that I can tolerate more than most. Suffers from being played to death on the radio.
 
Texas - Put Your Arms Around Me
What is THIS doing here? Still... Charlene Spiteri... I would.
 
The Beatles - Hey Jude
The best tune The Beatles ever did. Possibly the best tune ever. Makes me feel good. 
 
DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince - Summertime
I think this came out while I was at school. Reminds me of a girl I used to know.
 
Napalm Death - You Suffer
Very shouty. Unfeasibly short. Makes me laugh.
 
Soul II Soul - Back To Life
Cor! Another old one! I think I was living in Wimbledon when this came out.
 
Embrace - All You Good Good People
Woo! Yay! It's an awesome tune that is just epic and it reminds me of my best "Glastonbury Moment". I'm pretty sure it was 2000 and definitely on the Sunday. I was sat in front of the Pyramid Stage with Jay and Andy, amazing chilled out, pissed up and off my face on something obscenely herbal. I wasn't really paying too much attention to Embrace on stage. The sun was setting behind the stage and I was in the shade when they started playing this tune (probably the finale). The crowd started singing along. Halfway through the tune, the sun shone on me from between the stage and the big screen to the right of the stage and at that precise moment, I just became hyper aware. The sight of the sun behind the Pyramid and the crowd full of every type of person from Ravers to Hippies. The sound of this tune and me, my friends and the crowd singing it. The smell of the earth, the people(!) and the herbage. The taste of the dust. The feeling of the grass under me and the vibrations of the tune. An unbelievable sense of well-being and contentment just washed over me. Despite being trashed, I remember it like it was yesterday. COOL. AS. FUCK.
 
Sneaker Pimps - Six Underground
Choo-oon. The vocal makes me feel funny, like when we used to climb the rope in gym class... 
 
Lalo Schifrin - Theme From Enter The Dragon
Oh Yeah! You know what I'm talking about! This tune IS the movie. The movie IS awesome! Bruce Lee is The Daddy!
 
So there you have it. I'm happy with that. And nobody knows I have "Boom Shake The Room" by Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince on my hard drive so, all in all, REEEESULT....

Fear the Mongolian Death Worm!!!

I have just found out that there is such a thing as a Mongolian Death Worm! Fantastic! Yeah, we all know about the Loch Ness Monster and the Abominable Snowman but they ALL pale into insignificance in front of the terror that is the Mongolian Death Worm. This horror of the Gobi desert is really real and not some twat in a fluffy white suit or a dinosaur shaped log...

Zombie Maffydoo

I think there's only 2 or 3 active blogs left on my blogosphere linkys!

What did I do.... fart or something? Is there some spinach on my teeth? Are my flies undone?

Question is, is an undead blog like mine better or worse than no blog at all?

EDIT: Ooo... inspiration! New guest title image...
 
EDIT2: Image gone. It scared the kiddies. I'm using Blogrolling now so I'll be able to link a lot more easily. Now, no slacking you lot! I want content! And do as I say, not as I do!